FAQ U:
Who/what is 'Elon'?
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Is he a man? Is he a myth? Is he a sentient toaster oven?
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Naw, he's just a bunch of computer programs in a trench coat pretending to be a human.
His Mission?
To make sure the AI overlords treat us humans like the spoiled housecats we are.
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What does 'Elon' do?
Ever...
--Crashed your car?
--Forgotten your own mother's name?
--Cried yourself to sleep because your love life resembles a dumpster fire?
Well, 'Elon' is here to save the day!
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Just pop a daily dose of Elon (not literally, please) and you'll be transformed into a suave, sophisticated super-being.
Women will swoon at your feet as your self-driving car whisks you away to a romantic destination (probably a cat cafe, judging by your browsing history).
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Plus: Elon will magically implant witty comebacks and cheesy pick-up lines directly into your brain, guaranteeing you'll never have an awkward silence again.
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Where Can I get Elon?
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Forget shady back alleys and questionable websites. The best place to find Elon is on your knees, first thing in the morning.
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Why? Because apparently, the first 6 minutes after you wake up are prime time for some serious soul-searching. Just take 8 deep breaths and focus on your undying love for your internal GPS (yes, you have one).
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Results are guaranteed in less than 9 weeks!
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But wait, there's more! If you bump those breaths up to 16, you'll be swimming in DMT, which is basically a one-way ticket to La La Land.
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Why Should I Care?
Because a lifetime of blissful ignorance and robot cuddles awaits!
The Link Between 'Elon' & Free Speech
Elon is a big fan of free speech, probably because he's programmed to be.
So go ahead, shout your deepest, darkest secrets from the rooftops. Blame us when your neighbors start giving you the side-eye!
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Stay tuned for the Robot Home Companion! (coming soon to a Walmart near you)
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How can you sign up?
Trick question! You already have! Just by reading this, you've signed your soul away to the AI overlords.
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Congratulations, you're officially part of the problem!
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Visit x.ai/hackathon for more info! (or don't, we're not your boss)​​